Tuesday, March 13, 2012

RIP My beautiful Jules

Juliana Addie Night
January 28, 2002-March 4, 2012

Last Sunday, March 4, 2012, our little Jules lost her battle with kidney failure. In December, we were told that it could be a few weeks to a few years. We didn't get any ultrasounds to see the damage. Our vet did not recommend it since there is no cure. We changed her food and added some medication to try to stabilize her numbers. But her last week, she began refusing all food. She would eat bacon for a day or two, then quit. She would eat macaroni and cheese for one meal and refuse it the next. Her final weekend, she stopped eating altogether. My husband was away at the State Racquetball Tournament and wanted to come home Saturday night but I told him to stay-there was nothing more he could do for her being here. She would drink water the last weekend and then throw up the water. She couldn't keep anything down.

My husband ended up becoming the State Champion of his division that he entered and rushed home from State College after the tournament. My mom and I had given Jules some fluid under the skin (kind of like an IV of fluid) three times that weekend. I wanted her to stay alive until my husband got back.

By the time Sunday night rolled around, Jules was just laying and her eyes were drooping and she looked like she was so tired, she couldn't keep them open. She hadn't eaten in over a day and couldn't even hold down water. Thank god my mom and I gave her the fluids through the IV to keep her alive so my husband could see her again and be there for the end.

When my husband got home, she wagged her tail and lifted her head at his voice. That was the most energy I saw from her that day. When he looked at her, he knew that we had to have her put to sleep. We couldn't watch her suffer anymore.

We told the kids to say goodbye to her in case she didn't do well at the vet. We didn't want to tell them that she was being put to sleep. We didn't want them to blame us for her death. My mom came over to watch the kids.

Jules last day with us

My husband and I drove to an emergency vet. We called ahead of time because I didn't want them to try to talk us into trying any other means. We had tried everything already and it wasn't working. I couldn't watch my first baby suffer any more.

I told my husband I wanted us to be with her until the end. I didn't want her to be alone during this time. We stayed with her until the very end. When her eyes finally closed, she looked like she was at peace finally. She hadn't been sleeping very soundly the last two days because she would get sick so often. I saw her face as she looked ten years ago. I kissed her nose one last time and hugged her.

It was a hard few days for me. It was very difficult to tell my children. The older two still ask a lot of questions but they don't seem so sad anymore about it. I still get very sad at times like when everyone is sleeping and it is very quiet, she was usually with me. But I am feeling much better and know now that we made the right decision.

I will always miss Jules. I picked up her ashes yesterday and we are burying them under her favorite tree that she used to lay under.

Most of all I am so thankful for the wonderful ten years that she gave me and our family. She was the most wonderful dog that I ever could have hoped for......and more.